Ocarina Songs

Aloha people. I know I haven't made a blog post in ages, and I'll blame that on me not feeling like it. But that's okay, right? This is just a blog post that you're reading, while wasting time. Seriously, people, get productive! Anyway, I bought a ocarina at the Renascence Fair a few months ago and decided I want to learn a bunch of songs from video games, for the ocarina can make a video-game-like sound if one was to blow into the holes a certain way. So let's get right down to it...

First of all, for all those people out there who don't own an ocarina, here are a few links to some pretty awesome Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time replicas.
I made some song instructions things right here, so here they are!
 

 



How to look beautiful (kinda)

You know when your friend is really self-couscous about the way she looks, so she would watch Michelle Phan all day? And when she actually ties to do her hair and makeup, she ends up looking like a dying cockroach? 

Well I'm here to help! I'm going to show all those worthless and pathetic pieces of crap out there how to actually look pretty!! I'm joking, your not worthless, but it is kind of pathetic to work so hard on your face and end up looking like dog crap. Anyway, I'm going to show you how to be naturally beautiful, using just 6 steps! It really works! And, it's easy, because it is simply common sense.

Step 1: SMELL
Brush your teeth.
Um... I bet she feels so beautiful... eh.
If you don't, don't expect any kisses. And you might end up smelling like crap
Imagine this guy askin' you this.

If you didn't shower the day before, shower now.
...You dirty mutt.

Also, Put on deodorant. I like to put on my super magical sparkle fairy dust scented deodorant:
*angels singing in the background noises*


Step 2: SKIN
When you wake up in the morning, wash your face with water to get rid of the disgusting microscopic creatures living on your face!! 
This is what you may be experiencing...
And this is what the poor germs are experiencing.

It is also good for getting rid of pimples, or preventing them.
Poor Mr.Pimple

Step 3: HAIR
After cleaning your hideous face (kidding) Brush your hair.
Girl attempting to brush hair

Start at the bottom or the ends of your hair, and work your way to the roots, getting rid of all the knots. If your hair is really knotty in the morning (like mine), use a comb, not a brush, you ding dongs (kidding again)!!
Then Straighten or curl (or simply style your hair). Don't burn your hair!! And don't attempt to "braid" your hair if you're just going to knot it back up again. When I wake up the morning, I just keep it the way it is, in fact, I don't really need to brush or style my hair because I half natural beach waves (I live in Florida, yay!) and I do know that I have a lot of knots in my hair, but It adds to the puffiness of my hair. I like the bedhead look. 
It's funny because I don't have a nose... and I have doo doo in my hair. 


Just kidding.

Step 4: HANDS & FEET
Make sure that your hands are clean, and your fingernails are trimmed (not trimmed too much) and free of any gross dirt under the nails. If your hands are dirty, that is a big turnoff. You would be poisoned by the food you are holding because of the disgusting, terrifying hands, and if you touch someone they might turn into a zombie
wash your hands, butt head. SAME GOES WITH YOUR FEET!
Ew... it's glowing.


Step 5: CLOTHES
You might feel like this is a big part of what people think of you, but it really isn't. Some people might deeply care if you wear Hollister or not. But people who aren't morons, will not give a shiz what you wear. As long as it covers you up, and somewhat shows your manly/girly figure.

Oh, and if you can't figure out what too wear, just go out naked.

Step 6: THE WAY YOUR ARE
Listen, everyone is born beautiful. And if you want to be pretty or handsome, it's pretty simple. Be confident in yourself, and nothing can stop you. You know the old saying: 
Beauty is not what you see, 
but how you feel.
       -Michelle Phan 
And I DON'T eat doo doo.


MY SISTER'S FEET.

I remember when I was in 4th grade, me and my friend and I would always have  sleepovers. Me and my friend would sleep on my full-bed and my sis was always afraid of the dark or something so she would secretly curl up beside us in the somewhat small bed secretly, in the middle of the night, while me and my friend are sleeping. The first time this happened, I thought some stranger was going to kill us, but no, it was just my not very smart sister. 

Anyway, one time, my sister did something REALLY weird in the bed. 
Don't pee in it!
So basically, I was the first to fall asleep, so I slept on my bed.
Don't disturb me.
Then my friend went to sleep beside me.
DON'T GET ANY BAD IDEAS!!
Then in the middle of the night, my sister comes up and sleeps near our feet and sticks her feet in our mouths unconsciously and wakes us up. 
My dumb twin is sticking her feet in our faces as she sleeps, and giggling.
Yeash, let's just say my sis woke up with a black eye and food on her forehead.
Speaking of foreheads, I have a big one. 

I FEEL SO WASTED!!

I bet many people have been in this situation before. You text somebody and they don't text you back. And you know how you have to pay like 15 cents for EVERY SINGLE TEXT. So it's almost like your wasting money on somebody. 

This has been going on for me for a few years now. My friend (Let's nickname her Anne, for now.), never ever seams to answer my texts, emails, calls, anything. She used to answer my calls, but now I'm beginning to think she is too retarded to use her phone, or I wonder if she forgot how to use her phone.
This is my demented friend, learning how to learn her phone.
So, I would text "Hey Anne!" and five minutes later she would not respond. So I'd say "Hello? You there?" and I still don't get an answer. 

This carries on and it gets to the point where I think Anne is mad at me or something. I say "You know, you don't have to give me the silent treatment. If your mad at me, just say it!". I get extremely frustrated and stare at my phone in despair and agony and wait for her to respond. 
Me staring at cell phone in despair and agony.
I tried texting her for hours and hours, and I never got a reply. -.-
12:00 pm

6:00 pm

9:00 am
After sending a couple hate text-messages, she finally answers. "GOSH GOSH, HAILEE! I love you but your not giving me a chance to speak at all! GOD!". I stare at my phone in complete confusion.


I was trying to message her for 4 hours. I sent a text every 10 minutes or so. So I suppose, passably Anne has a very simple and slow mind, And maybe it takes her 30 min to send a 10 word text. So I gave her time to think after my next text. "What's up?"


I waited 10 min. No reply. So this is basically what the next hour looked like:
I wait.

I wait.

I wait.

I wait.

I go mental as I wait.
So I start to accept the fact that she will probably never text me back, and just as I accept it, she finally texts back. "Pooping". 

ARE YOU @#$%ING SERIOUS??? I WAIT SO MANY HOURS FOR THIS! I WAIT SO LONG AND MY ONLY RESPONSE IS POOPING?? WHAT KIND OF WORLD DO WE LIVE IN!! @#$%!!!

So yeah, I flipped out for a while...
"ARRGGHHHH!!"
And that, my friends, is how I feel about ignoring texts. 



The new hairdo

Rawr!!
I am so bored, and anything i would do to not do my homework. In this case, I know this is awkward for some, but I have been searching up hair. No, no pubic hair... the hairdos. Like this really cool one that is to your... left. The tiger. I mean, holey shiz (Yes I just said shiz.) It probably took  that lady 5 hours to do that... :P

But there are even crazier hairstyles too. Some people shave their nearly bald haed to make faces and drawings and crap. My dad is bald too (sadly) but he could even start shaving his tiny hair so it looks like crap too.
Each time I see the "baldy art" it reminds me of a bunch of rappers... Well anyway, let's get to it, here is that bald picture thingy I was talking about. It is to the right right over there -> -> -> 
COOL SHAVE MAN!!
Yeah, this is the kind of crap I'm talking about. So... Bleh. You know what, I am going to create up a new word for this kind of hair art. I will call it... "shave". It is a noun. For example, your homeys or whatever, would walk up and say, "Oh man! Dude! I like your shave man!" and high-five you like an ideot. You know, normal fake-gangster stuff-- sense the gangster stuff is kind of popular now... So... this guys shave is awesome man! Awesome!!  I don't think you can relize this but I can do a funny hippy voice. I'll put up a video of my latest hippynessishness up soon. Sooo..... yeash.

 Although this big piece of shit on this old lady's head is beautiful, it is also heavy and kind of weird. Imagine seeing some person at walmart with a big thingy on her head. He head would wobble a bit because the thingy is so heavy... whatever. It looks cool :)

...

I just wonder how much hair extentions she uses.. eh?



Angora Rabbit


I can't even describe this huge fluffy animal.
I would name him "fluffy". :P